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Subjective Statements

◆ · By SporcleMirror · Published 2022-09-16T11:06:16.842Z

Constructor's Note
My entry in the September midi contest. I couldn't get long fill to fit in the grid so I decided to get wacky with the clues instead. Enjoy!
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  • kieranjboyd 🤓3:32 · 2022-09-16T12:10:26.927Z
    Fun clues throughout!
    • Adam 🤓3:32 · 2022-09-16T13:22:35.250Z
      Cool!
      • Mike D 4:05 · 2022-09-16T23:30:13.459Z
        Fun one!
        • emmie 🤓3:29 · 2022-09-17T02:26:30.316Z
          Really fun cluing!
          • Maxish 🤓5:13 · 2022-09-17T15:46:17.441Z
            Lovely! Nice meta clue on HARE!
            • T. G. 5:19 · 2022-09-17T19:47:37.594Z
              Nice job!
              • quatrevingtneuf 🤓3:50 · 2022-10-06T15:09:52.568Z
                Congrats, you’ve won the contest for September! Let me know your theme choice for next month!
                • SporcleMirror constructor · 2022-10-08T07:31:35.350Z
                  I just emailed @mike about it like last time.
                  • quatrevingtneuf 🤓3:50 · 2022-10-08T23:13:09.238Z
                    Well I've made a fantastic gaffe à la Oscars 2017 and announced the wrong winner for the contest last month. Very sorry to have given you the "La La Land" treatment. Still a fantastic puzzle though, only separated by one vote!
                Play today's daily mini crossword
                1A
                Captain who totally should've learned to speak whale (seriously, where's Dory when you need her?)
                1
                2
                3
                4
                5
                6
                7
                8
                9
                10
                11
                12
                13
                14
                15
                16
                17
                18
                19
                20
                21
                22
                23
                24
                25
                26
                27
                28
                29
                30
                31
                32
                33
                34
                35
                Across
                1. 1A
                  Captain who totally should've learned to speak whale (seriously, where's Dory when you need her?)
                2. 5A
                  Counterfeit, bogus
                3. 9A
                  Implement used in schools when paper wasn't a thing
                4. 10A
                  One of the three legs in the Sphinx's riddle
                5. 11A
                  "Ugh, I HATE geography, especially having to memorize all of these place names. Seriously, ____ is this stuff?"
                6. 13A
                  Pink Floyd's "____ You Were Here"
                7. 14A
                  Bird perches such as birches
                8. 15A
                  Bug
                9. 16A
                  Sticker for school children?
                10. 18A
                  "Math isn't my strong suit either, but if you take the time to explain things to me, then ____"
                11. 23A
                  ____ bloomer (...no, it's not "OKAY")
                12. 24A
                  Org. within "keep away smog"
                13. 25A
                  Part of a baseball cap
                14. 28A
                  Metal in blood
                15. 29A
                  "Chemistry, on the other hand - especially when we do experiments in the lab... that's when I truly am ____!"
                16. 32A
                  How your voice is meant to sound WHEN YOU TYPE IN ALL CAPS LIKE THIS!!!
                17. 33A
                  Just like ewe
                18. 34A
                  Tolkien creatures who most likely have no idea of what an otorhinolaryngologist is
                19. 35A
                  Unit of cell data? (or the protagonist of the Emoji Movie, but I'd rather not bring up the Emoji Movie)
                Down
                1. 1D
                  Cold state
                2. 2D
                  Owneth Shakespeare's wife, with "away"?
                3. 3D
                  ___ Z (like the dictionary)
                4. 4D
                  Big ___ (world-famous bell tower) (cue "it's not the tower at all" comments)
                5. 5D
                  Like Luigi in "Luigi's Mansion", pretty much all the time
                6. 6D
                  Animal that's beyond cross?
                7. 7D
                  Poker term that's Latin for "before"
                8. 8D
                  "It's OK... I guess" interjections (or 35-Across and others in the Emoji Movie, but I'd rather not bring up the Emoji Movie)
                9. 9D
                  Word sometimes implied to follow "tee"
                10. 11D
                  Abbr. in a Call of Duty game title
                11. 12D
                  Piano exercise (or something pupils do at any normal école) (I think, I don't know my French that well)
                12. 16D
                  It makes people stone-faced
                13. 17D
                  Value measured in degrees from the equator (abbr.)
                14. 19D
                  British insurance giant
                15. 20D
                  At peace
                16. 21D
                  A point ahead
                17. 22D
                  What pupils may do after (or during) an intense gym class
                18. 25D
                  Like a demon, even when you move the last letter to the start
                19. 26D
                  Words before "the joke"
                20. 27D
                  Writing that's far from kid-friendly
                21. 28D
                  "Sign me up!"
                22. 30D
                  Part of a raft, or diary on a ship
                23. 31D
                  Apple tester?
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