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◆◆ · By greenturtle3141 · Published 2024-11-06T15:46:20.271Z

Constructor's Note
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  • AuLeaf 🤓16:09 · 2024-11-07T01:55:21.525Z
    ONYX
1A
It's used for text alignment
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Across
  1. 1A
    It's used for text alignment
  2. 8A
    Get good
  3. 15A
    Like the answer to every clue, probably
  4. 16A
    It may turn on while being read
  5. 17A
    With "known", a code-breaking strategy
  6. 19A
    It provides guidelines for stuff like structural integrity and fire prevention, for short (anagram of a brand of pens)
  7. 20A
    Cookie-cutter
  8. 21A
    Luau dish
  9. 22A
    Tolkien creatures (but spelled in a slightly different way that Tolkien himself adopted after Lord of the Rings)
  10. 24A
    Kidney-related adjective
  11. 25A
    Ok look, you do get some kind of test acronym when you Google this, but it's a waste of both my time and yours to clue it like that. So, let's just pretend I clued this properly and give you an additional clue: With "-ndid", it means "magnificient"
  12. 26A
    John ___ (Explorer of North America who is known for discovering Newfoundland)
  13. 28A
    .x3+-x3+.x3
  14. 29A
    Glows
  15. 30A
    Ends of batteries (the ones that are popular in crosswords)
  16. 32A
  17. 33A
    Pokemon ___
  18. 34A
    Playing the brass woodwind for the band, perhaps
  19. 35A
    Dull finishes
  20. 38A
    Some college usernames
  21. 41A
    It hurts (slightly archaic) (anagram of REACH)
  22. 42A
    It has eau
  23. 44A
    "How do I fire this torpedo?" "You need to ___ first." (3, 2)
  24. 45A
    Marsh lifeform
  25. 46A
    A really archaic word which is a synonym of "hexed". Since this word sucks here's an additional hint: It can be found in "Incurs torment".
  26. 48A
    Something a pirate might say (cryptogram of XXXY)
  27. 49A
    Title for my AP Spanish teacher
  28. 50A
    Hosted
  29. 52A
    Response to finding out that my friend ****** a *** and ******* *** **** and then **** *** *** in *** *****
  30. 53A
    Landmark internet catastrophe
  31. 56A
    I was going to write a funny clue here but now it is no longer funny or true. Yikes. Oh this word ends in E btw
  32. 57A
    Like this extremely meta, self-referential, and arguably overly verbose clue, which in fact, in some sense, explicitly gave away the answer as an explicit crossword clue anyhow, thus rendering most of this fluff completely unnecessary, and yet, at the same time, justifying its enormous length with humor and quirky style
  33. 58A
    Swimmer with a large tusk
  34. 59A
    The ___ (Family music group consisting of Alan, Wayne, Merrill, Jay, and Donny)
Down
  1. 1D
    Pearls found under the tea?
  2. 2D
    High fibre cereal product
  3. 3D
    Play ground?
  4. 4D
    ___-Hub (Major contributor to academic research)
  5. 5D
    Tim ___ Test (Internet challenge that supposedly nobody has finished)
  6. 6D
    One who chooses (anagram of TROPE)
  7. 7D
    Genus of fish that you probably never heard of (found in "Timelapse nest")
  8. 8D
    Fishes that sell for 500 bells in Animal Crossing (they're real fishes too)
  9. 9D
    Track in the shape of a certain vowel letter, used for some shower curtains
  10. 10D
    Back in college a friend decided to take a course with them called "Military Ethics" or something like that, for short
  11. 11D
    Japanese telecommunications holding company, for short (anagrams to an explosive)
  12. 12D
    4 - 4/3 + 4/5 - 4/7 + 4/9 - 4/11 is a pretty bad one
  13. 13D
    Caramel-colored sodas
  14. 14D
    Most tasting like the barrel it was stored in, as wine
  15. 18D
    ___ gas (Resource that powers the ion engine in Kerbal Space Program)
  16. 23D
    Very old (2, 5)
  17. 25D
    Sixth largest island in the world
  18. 27D
    go:ir::have:?
  19. 29D
    Confused
  20. 31D
    Cards that add more storage, for short
  21. 32D
    First female Phantom Thief (I promise this is a very normal name)
  22. 35D
    He portrayed Cyclops in X-Men films (anagram of REMANDS)
  23. 36D
    Another name for the Barbados cherry
  24. 37D
    Copy
  25. 39D
    Home's home
  26. 40D
    Pull them to bend the rules
  27. 42D
    Slippery swimmer that likes to inhabit wet ground
  28. 43D
    Fill out a G. Forms for an event, perhaps
  29. 46D
    "There ___ wind like a bugle" (4, 1)
  30. 47D
    ___ Pictures ("Production company" that made like 8 posters, plagiarized all its ideas, and then died without making a single film)
  31. 50D
    Planet where Luke really should have died after being upside-down for a long time
  32. 51D
    The ___ (Mobile escape game series)
  33. 54D
    The order in which the four special squares are to be read (starting from the rightmost one) for the final answer, for short
  34. 55D
    ___-mo
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